I am happy to announce that my grandson Jackson is now able to swim!  It has taken a bit of effort to get him to accomplish this, since by nature he is a bit timid about the water, but it has now opened up a world of great fun for him this upcoming summer. 

For the past two summers we have tried very hard to accomplish getting him to swim, with little progress being made.  Between his natural fear, and the fact that we only can practice with him when the occasion presents itself, each time we would feel we were making advancements, he would then go home and by the time he came back and went in the pool, we practically had to start from scratch.  But this summer I will be watching Jackson each day while his parents work.  He  has developed quite a few good friendships with the children in my neighborhood, and I was becoming increasingly concerned that he would feel badly about himself if his friends were all swimming in our pool while  he was floating around with a pair of swimmers wrapped around his upper arms.  Worried about this for him,  I decided that this summer would be the time for him to accomplish this feat.

 

Last Tuesday was a beautiful day, and I asked Jackson if he wanted to swim.  Of course he said yes, but asked if I was going to get in the pool with him.  I didn’t feel like putting on my swimsuit, nor getting my hair wet, so I told him I would sit on the pool edge and play with him.  I didn’t put the floaties on his arms and allowed him to do what he does in that situation;  which is to do a small doggie paddle close to the sides, where he can grab onto the stones easily.  He kept trying to convince me to come in, and finally, in a show of great amusement, I allowed him to pull me in, clothes and all.  He laughed so heartily that it made soaking my hair, shorts, and tee-shirt well worth it.  We joked around and I held him as we swung about for a bit, and then I got an idea.  Knowing he is highly competitive, I asked if he knew how to just put his face in the water for a quick second.  ”Sure I can,” he responded.  ”Well then show me,” I challenged.  He held his nose, closed his eyes tightly and for just a split second, dunked his face in the water.  “Horray,” I said, cheering him on, but my mind was working in full gear to take advantage of this situation and his competitive nature.  So I came up with a small game.  “I bet I can stick my head in for three seconds, and you can’t,” I threw out to him.  “I can too,” Jackson shot back, and without even waiting for me to do it with him, he stuck his little head under the water.  Cheering him on, and feigning disbelief at his great effort, I kept adding to the clock, challenging him to put his face in for five seconds, then ten, allowing him to beat me by staying under longer than I could each time.  He was laughing so hard at beating out his old Grammie that it spurred him on to show me he was able to do more than I could.  Finally I said ”Look at you!  I bet you can’t stay down a whole 30 seconds.” “Oh yeah,” he countered, and counted to three as our heads went under.  I could see under the water and after about fifteen seconds I popped my head up, still counting loudly, so I was sure he could hear.  This little fish kept his head under for a full forty-two seconds, and it was then that I knew he was more than ready for the next challenge. 

 

“Jackson,” I began, “you have such strong lungs that I know you can swim easily,” I encouraged.  “If you can keep your head under water for almost a minute, you surely can swim anywhere in this pool,” I told him.  “I can’t, Grammie,” he responded.  “Sure you can,” I softly encouraged.  “If you held your breath and went under for so very long I know you can swim from the steps to me, because that would only take less than ten seconds.”  He thought about this for a minute and said, “okay, Grammie, but will you grab me if I start sinking?” ”Of course I will Jackson, you know that I would never, ever let you get hurt.  I’m right here, and I know you can do it,” I encouraged.  With a rally of cheering I stood a distance away from the steps and off he went, head under, and swam all the way to me.  I made a huge production of this and we did this over and over, each time stepping back just a little further, while counting how long he stayed under each time.  He was so proud of himself, because now he knew he could do it. 

 

Well, success surely breeds success, because next thing we tried was a cannonball off the edge of the pool.  A slight bit tentative at first, I reminded him that if he could keep his head under for almost a minute he could surely get his whole head wet for a second until it popped back up.  My encouragement gave him the strength and courage he needed to give it a try. He stood at the edge of the pool and I held his hand that very first time, until he was willing to do it without my hand. It was the most beautiful little cannonball I ever saw.  We laughed and played, me in my soaked clothing, and him with a great smile of self-satisfaction, for quite a long time; taking in all the joy of his newfound skills.  He was finally able to swim and had no need to feel badly when his friends came over to play in the pool, because he would now feel confident and on level with his little friends.

 

So now my role this summer has become camp director of the young children in the neighborhood. Yesterday three of his friends came over for the afternoon, and I sat playing lifeguard, and watched this group of four children jumping off the rocks into the pool, racing each other across the width of the pool, and playing  heartily in the water.  I thought back to last week, when this door of confidence had opened, and was reminded of how my gentle soothing words and encouragement had given him the ability to trust me enough to break free of his fears.  It had opened a whole new world for him, and I am so very happy that his summer will reflect the joy and play that this accomplishment offers.  In the process of  pondering on this, I began to think of my own life, and a strong connection was made in an area where I have been lacking. 

 

Since early March I have been taking care of my 85 year old mother-in-law, who we took in to live with us rather than putting her in a nursing home.  It has brought with it many challenges and stresses that I was not even aware of, and is certainly a full-time job.  She cannot walk well, and requires a walker for the short distances between her bedroom and the family room or kitchen, and has many issues that must be dealt with.  I have discussed this is previous writings, and although I am happy to do this, it certainly is very stressful and time-consuming.  Sadly, in my efforts to be there for my mother-in-law, I have not been taking the time I know I should to read my Bible.  I have excused this, saying I am doing the work of the Lord in helping Mom, so He certainly understands.  Yet as I sat watching these children, it suddenly dawned on me where so much of my stress was coming from.  I had forgotten to hear the voice of the Lord.  Sure I know the story, all He did for us, and all He promises; but knowing it is different from hearing His encouragement.  In the same manner that hearing my voice, soothing and encouraging at the same time, was able to give Jackson the strength and courage to overcome an obstacle in his life, I realized that I was missing out on hearing His voice, soothing and encouraging, that would help me in my day-to-day struggles I was now being faced with. 

 

Doing His will is not enough, and the Bible tells us this. It is not about works, so what I am doing for my mother-in-law not only isn’t a free pass, but my works can never feed my soul.   I had forgotten this, in my wholehearted willingness to be there for my mother-in-law.  The workload is great, and something had to give, so I had been putting my reading on a back burner, content that I was still working in the Lord through my actions.  Now I know why I wasn’t able to do my writing either.  I had attempted it over and over, and it just wasn’t coming together.  I was sad to meet with such frustration and inability to publish any new material, but had put it down to being too busy to concentrate, with all of the disruptions that come along in helping Mom.  That wasn’t that at all, and now I see it so clearly.  It is His Word;  His voice, that sustains us, that encourages us, and gives us strength to work with the struggles and stresses of daily life.  Though I know His Word, knowing it is different from hearing it.

 

In the same manner that Jackson was able to learn to swim in hearing my soothing voice, my encouragement, and being able to trust in me, I can break free and deal with the challenges in my own life only through His Word. Reading my Bible is not a requirement or chore given to us to fulfill.  Our Bible is His gif to us.  It is not for Him, it was given to us to sustain us and help us to grow in trust and faithfulness. His Word soothes and encourages.  His voice comforts and rebukes.  Having been taught that  He is with me is far different from hearing those soothing Words that tell me :

 Isaah 41:10 “So do not fear, for I am with you;
do not be dismayed, for I am your God.
I will strengthen you and help you;
I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.”

  

Psalm 32:8 gives me strength when I feel I have no more strength, and yet I had forgotten His Words that tell me:
I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go; I will counsel you and watch over you.

 

I had been too busy to listen to His Word, believing that I could accomplish much is doing His will, but without His voice I forgot that Isaiah 58:11 tells me:
The Lord will guide you continually, and satisfy your needs in parched places, and make your bones strong, and you shall be like a watered garden, like a spring of water, whose waters never fail.

 

The Word of God is my shield. It allows me to stay on course, knowing that I am following His perfect plan for my life.  I find in His Word all the things I forget when I lose sight of what He has told me.  To trust.  To listen.  To follow.  I can only break free of the bondages of human suffering by rising through His instruction, and being reminded of it daily.  Without it, I am like Jackson was, floundering in waters that threaten to overwhelm me sometimes.  I might try buoying myself up with being ‘good’, or ‘faithful in works’, but unless I am hearing Him; soothing away my fears and helping me to follow the path He has set for me, I will never be able to ease my daily struggles.  In the same manner that Jackson was able to listen to my words and trust in me, when I listen to His Word, and trust in Him, I can then cut free of my worries or stress, able to open a world of opportunity, swimming freely in a pool that refreshes my soul, exercises my faith, and trusts in His voice that I choose to follow.

One of the things I find most challenging in my spiritual walk is being able to ‘let go, and let God’ work within me.  Even when I get on a path where I believe I am acting in spirituality, it is sometimes difficult to remain open to change.  We like where we are, and decide to walk in faith our own way, without remaining open to how it is that HE may wish to work in our lives.  This just happened to me with my writing, which is somewhere I never thought I would find frustration. 

Writing is a challenging hobby that I have wanted to embark on my entire life.  Due to busy schedules and raising my children the opportunity never seemed to present itself until last year, when due to some medical situations I was no longer working outside the home.  My children are now grown so I saw this as an opportunity to give my writing a chance, and since my faith is something I am very passionate about, I made the decision to create a blog.  I sat and thought for a long time over what to name the blog, and was satisfied once I chose If Not For Sunday, since I felt it represented how I truly feel within my spirit and heart.  I strongly believe that we must live every day developing and nurturing a relationship with Christ, aware of the power of God,  while tuning into the stirrings of the Holy Spirit within us.  Simply believing, and attending  church services each Sunday will never create the changes we wish to see in ourselves, and I felt that taking everyone along on my journey might expose the weakness of humanity and the power of how Christ can help us overcome obstacles in our path.  What started out as a sweet message reminding us all to be kind and compassionate has transformed over the year, into a journal of my walk, and the changes that are brought into my life through Christ.  It can be hard to expose myself sometimes, showing weakness, or challenges I face, but through them, we all grow, we all learn, and we all see the power of Christ alive in humanity.

So here I have been, for the past nine months, writing and enjoying my fellowship with those who read my writings.  I found a place on this planet where I am comfortable, I am at home, and I feel like I have something to offer others.  Life was good, and then out of the blue I was  faced a few months ago with the decision of caring for my mother-in-law or putting her in a nursing home.  I prayed on it, and followed His lead, so Mom has come to stay with us and share our home, our laughter, our tears, and most of all our love.  I know it is all that is good, but often I can become frustrated.   It isn’t the work or stresses that come along with taking in an aging family member that was frustrating me, but I was getting upset that my writing was suffering.  Where before I had been able to write freely, I no longer always have that time.  Each time I sit to write it seems Mom needs me for something and I can become frustrated inside in the fact that it is much harder for me to concentrate on writing enough to accomplish what I feel I am called to do.  But is it what I am called to do, or what I wish believe I am called to do?   I am reminded daily that just because I am doing something in the name of Christ doesn’t always make it how Christ wishes to work in me at any given time.  It is then that I must be faithful and be reminded that I must let go and let God.  In doing this even more has now been revealed to me.

Mom was raised a very strict Catholic, and I do not ever recall her missing church.  She and Dad went to confession each Saturday, followed by Sunday morning Mass.  She went to church on every holy day in between, and even when her mother passed away she wore black for a year.  She had an altar in her home on the dresser in her mother’s room, and prayed there daily.  As she got older she kept to this as much as possible, and I remember that whenever we would visit her in Florida she still sat each morning reciting her rosary after eating her breakfast. I always had felt intimidated and pretty lame, since I was too afraid to even have her teach me what it was she actually did with those rosary beads, but somehow it was very important in her spiritual life.

 Since coming here two months ago I haven’t seen her do her rosary once.  She has sets of rosary beads on her dresser, on her lamp, and has her statues set nicely in her room, but I haven’t seen even a spark of the religious rituals she had always embarked on.  So the other day, while eating our lunch together, I asked Mom, who is 85 years old, why I don’t see her doing her rosary anymore.  I thought maybe she had forgotten how, in her old age, and was willing to help her with this if necessary.  I was very surprised at her response.  She started crying, and said that she thought God, and her husband who had passed away 8 years ago, might be angry with her.  She explained how she had been going to the cemetery every day after Dad died.  She would sit on a bench and just sit for hours, since she knew of no other life than the one she had lived with her husband of over 50 years.  It was so sad.  After some time the elderly gentleman, who was the groundskeeper for the cemetery, would come to sit and visit with her.  They became friends, and over the past years have become very close.  Somehow Mom has gotten it into her head that although she didn’t do anything she believes is ‘wrong’, she fears that her husband and God are angry with her for finding this male friend.  My heart broke as she sobbed and disclosed this separation from God and prayer.  I sat with her for a long time;  long after the tea had gone cold, explaining how God was not angry with her at all.  I spoke of how Dad would have wanted her to find companionship, and a friend, since he was not there any longer to fill her days with joy.  I took the words from my bible and showed her how God is a loving God, and even if she had done something wrong in her life, He forgives us.  He wants nothing but to share a relationship with us, and I explained that because she thought He was angry with her, she was depriving both God and herself with the friendship that they had shared her entire life.  After I felt I had said more than enough on the subject without pressuring her, I got up, cleared our plates, and settled her into her chair in the family room to enjoy her afternoon shows.  Yet for the remainder of the day Mom’s words weighed heavily on my heart.  How sad she was that her relationship with God had been severed because she felt she had done something where she needed to hide her face from His light.  She was such a good woman who had done nothing to make her feel this way, yet somehow she felt guilt, and as we know when we feel guilty, we run and we hide; much as Adam and Eve did in the Garden so long ago.

Over the next day or two I did not bring up the subject, fearing she would be sorry for sharing her fears with me, but chose a different path instead.  I used every opportunity to bring Christ into conversations while being very careful not to overplay it, where she would catch on to what I was doing. I simply used small things as reminders of how much He cares for us, and about us.  Then yesterday, as I was attempting to run to the store to go grocery shopping, the phone just would not stop ringing.  I needed to leave, and was very frustrated, since I was expecting a call from Mom’s doctor that I didn’t want to miss, so it kept delaying me.  I finally looked at Mom, and said I needed to leave.  I put the phone next to her, and told her if they called to tell them that I would call them back as soon as I returned.  As I was walking out I jokingly said to her that it was a good thing that God is a patient, loving, and forgiving God, because He certainly had His work cut out dealing with me and my patience level.  It wasn’t much, but it would hopefully add to the picture of God that I was trying to instill in her mind, that was so filled with fear of rejection from Him.

Then last night my oldest son came to me and asked if everything was okay with Grandma.  He said that while I was at the store yesterday Mom had gotten up to use the restroom.  She was gone much longer than he figured was normal, so he had gone to check on her.  He found her sitting on her bed;  crying, and holding her rosary beads, but was afraid to disturb her.   He just wanted to let me know that something was bothering her, that maybe I could help her with.  I smiled, as my eyes filled with tears, and I told my son that nothing was wrong at all, and in fact, everything was more right than he would ever know.  God is good.  He found a way to bring her back to Him, and showed me that whether I am finding the time to write, or finding the time to read; to smile at a stranger, or to tie the shoe of a small child, it is through serving Him that all things are possible.  Not only are they possible, they are most highly  probable!  Praise to you Lord Jesus Christ.

Psalm 119

49 Remember your word to your servant,
for you have given me hope.
50 My comfort in my suffering is this:
Your promise preserves my life.

Matthew 5:14-16
“You are the light of the world. A city set on a hill cannot be hidden. “Nor do men light a lamp, and put it under the peck-measure, but on the lampstand; and it gives light to all who are in the house. “Let your light shine before men in such a way that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father who is in heaven.

Matthew 23:11
“But the greatest among you shall be your servant

Philippians 2:1-4
If therefore there is any encouragement in Christ, if there is any consolation of love, if there is any fellowship of the Spirit, if any affection and compassion, make my joy complete by being of the same mind, maintaining the same love, united in spirit, intent on one purpose. Do nothing from selfishness or empty conceit, but with humility of mind let each of you regard one another as more important than himself; do not merely look out for your own personal interests, but also for the interests of others.

 

Matthew 28:18-20

And Jesus came and spoke to them, saying, “All authority has been given to Me in heaven and on earth. Go therefore and make disciples of all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, teaching them to observe all things that I have commanded you; and lo, I am with you always, even to the end of the age.” Amen

One question many non-believers ask of Christians is ‘how can you prove that Jesus Christ existed, and was not simply legend?’  Many Christians are stumped by this question, responding that they simply know it to be true by faith, since their belief is based on ‘legend’ rather than understanding.  “Could it simply be a legend, or a myth passed down from generation to generation in order to give a hope to humanity that we do not simply wither and die, much like a flower or the fading blades of grass in autumn?”  one might ask.  As I always have said, do not fear questioning, because in searching for truth, our faith is strengthened in understanding, rather than left vulnerable, and this question is no exception. 

To anyone who might believe that Christ was simply a legend passed down generationally, all they need to do is check history.  It is said that in terms of reliability, any writing done within 200 years of a historical event is considered close enough to be considered extremely reliable evidence.  There are numerous writings from both believers and non-believers that attest to the fact that Jesus Christ lived.  Whether or not He was who He claimed to be is left for later discussion, but we have solid historical evidence that this person did in fact live, and that He lived in or around Nazareth.

First we have the Epistles of Paul, whose writings were done, or at least done in part, approximately 40 years after the death of Jesus Christ.  In the Gospel of Luke, which shares many historical similarities with the other Gospels,  Paul’s writings were not simply historical legend passed down to him, but were accounts of what he  witnessed first hand while traveling with Jesus Christ.  If this information is not considered the ultimate in reliability, how is it that we can accept anything told to us, on any subject, as historical?  Why is it that we can talk to a 90-year-old survivor of the Titanic, or the only living veteran of WWI, in order  to gain useful information about something they witnessed in history, and this is accepted as fact.  Yet simply because Jesus Christ’s message was spiritual, and His resurrection is not something humanity perceives as possible, the historically accurate and reliable information is put under question.

 The disciples were not the only people who spoke of Jesus Christ walking the earth during this period. Flavius Josephus (AD37-c.100) was a famous Jewish writer and historian, who wrote about the destruction of Jerusalem in 70  AD.  In his many works he provided critical information about the first Jewish-Roman War, and his writings were an important literary source for understanding the Dead Sea Scrolls. He spoke very specifically about the Pharisees, the rise of Herod the Great, Jewish High Priests of the time, the zealots, Pontius Pilate, John the Baptist, and Jesus.  His work was so specific that it not only mentioned people of the time, but specific political issues and geographical locations.  After reading the writings of Josephus, an archaeologist from Hebrew University, by the name of Ehud Netzer, discovered the location of Herod’s Tomb.  After searching for approximately 35 years, he discovered the tomb above aqueducts and pools, at a flattened desert site, halfway up the hill to the Herodium, 12 kilometers south of Jerusalem.  This is exactly where Jospehus’s writings claimed it would be found!

On the specific subject of Christ, Josephus writes ‘Now there was about this time Jesus, a wise man, if it be lawful to call him a man; for he was a doer of wonderful works, a teacher of such men as receive the truth with pleasure.  He drew over to him both many of the Jews and many of the Gentiles.  He was (the) Christ.  And when Pilate, at the suggestion of the principal men amongst us, had condemned him to the cross, those that loved him at the first did not forsake him; for he appeared to them alive again the third day; as the divine prophets had foretold these and ten thousand other wonderful things concerning him.  And the tribe of Christians, so named from him, are not extinct at this day.”  The only other mention of Christ in any of Jospehus’ extensive historical writings was in the same book, The Antiquities of the Jews.  In the first paragraph of book 20, chapter 9 Josephus writes about the execution of a man who traditional scholars believe to be ‘James the Just’.  It reads: ‘so he assembled the Sanhedrin of judges, and brought before them the brother of Jesus, who was called Christ, whose name was James, and some others; and when he had formed an accusation against them as breakers of the law, he delivered them to be stoned;”

It is important to remember that Josephus was a Jew, not a Christian, and he was a historical writer, not a religious or biblical writer.  His accounts of Jesus Christ are noted in the same manner that every other aspect of his factual accounts are.  He was simply stating factual people, places, and events during his place and time in history..  If all of his other accounts have been affirmed, including an archeologist uncovering a tomb based on Josephus’ writings, why would we believe that the information pertaining to Jesus Christ might have been a lie thrown in the mix?  So it is clear that a very good man, by the name of Jesus, did in fact live during the period in question in the region of Jerusalem.  Once this has been accepted we are left with the question of if He was in fact the Son of God, who came to save the world.  If Jesus lived, and portrayed Himself to be the Son of God, and was not, then He was not a good man at all, but a liar and a blasphemer.  This goes in direct opposition to all His teachings on honesty, truth, and honoring the Father, so that would not make sense.  He gained nothing from this world, only offering Himself and a way to God. He asked for no money, no honor and fame, simply using His ministry as a means of sowing seeds of faith and understanding to a world lost without Him.

The strangest thing about belief system is that for those who wish to believe, they do not require much factual information, whereas for those who choose not to believe, no amount of factual information will suffice.  But the test of any information’s accuracy can be found in whether it works.  An example of this would be the Weight Watchers weight loss program.  We can factually read on the food groups, the combining of food groups, carbohydrates, total caloric intake, proteins, and the need for each serving of any food group to be classified with a point system value.  But the true validity of the Weight Watchers program does not rest in the concept, it relies on the results to affirm how valid the program is.  Weight Watchers has endured through many decades because when it is put to the test, and the diet is followed, it works. When a person stops using the principles taught through Weight Watchers they start to gain weight again.  So it is the results of the information gained, when put to the test, that determines its reliability. 

Short of Jesus coming to every town, in every generation, to ‘prove’ that He exists over and over, He has done the job He set out to accomplish.  He was crucified for our sins, died, was buried, and resurrected from the dead.  He showed Himself to his disciples, and others, to affirm that He had in fact overcome death.  He gave certain people, in the disciples, believers, and historians, the ability to write what it was that His Father wished for us to know.  This information was put to pen, in the form of our Bible.  When we read the Bible, and take in the Gospels, which are the accounts of those who actually saw and walked with Christ, a change comes over us.  We are never the same.  We do not have to work at it, and in fact Christ tells us specifically that we cannot find him through works.  In being open to receiving the Word of God, the Holy Spirit comes to us, counseling and transforming us in ways we could never have imagined.  It no longer becomes a belief based in a desire to overcome death; it becomes a love affair where our every desire is to conform to the image of the One who came to teach us and to give us hope.

Without behavior modification, what other book can simply make a person more compassionate?  What reading can change us into people who do not wish to judge others, and who wish to serve? What reading can take everything flawed in our humanity, and soften us to conform to all that is good, and pure?  Humanity, by nature, is selfish.  Without Christ we are no better than animals searching for survival and pleasure upon this Earth.  It is the Word of God alone that has the power to take us to a place where survival and pleasure in this world is no longer our goal.  We seek to share joy, compassion, kindness, servitude, and above everything, love.  Instead of feeling hatred for those who offend and persecute us, we feel nothing but hope and a desire for them to come to know what we have found.  It is the change it makes in people that makes all of this truth.  I know this, because it has happened to me.  I knew of Christ my whole life, and worked very hard at being a good Christian.  It worked in some areas of my life, but it was always a constant battle where I had to constantly be reminded of what I was called to be.  Then, when my eyes and ears were opened to the Word of God through my dearest friend, and I made the decision to read the gospels (the stories and accounts of those who walked with my Lord), my life changed.  This dear friend had no need to mentor me and teach me, for the Lord was teaching me.  I had no need to write out lists of ways that I could be a better person, because what I read was so provoking that it naturally made me want to reflect the image of the One I was reading about.

And so I say, to anyone who might question the history of Jesus Christ, or the accuracy of what He claimed to be, just pick up His Book.  Start with the first Gospel of Matthew, and read what He did, what He does, and how He wishes to work in you.  It is then that you will come to see exactly how true it is that Jesus Christ not only lived, but continues to live in all of those who believe.  Praise to you Lord Jesus Christ.

Isaiah 29

11 The whole vision has become to you like the words of a book that is sealed, which men deliver to one who is literate, saying, “Read this, please.”
And he says, “I cannot, for it is sealed.”
12 Then the book is delivered to one who is illiterate, saying, “Read this, please.”
   And he says, “I am not literate.”
13 Therefore the Lord said:
      “ Inasmuch as these people draw near with their mouths
      And honor Me with their lips,
      But have removed their hearts far from Me,
      And their fear toward Me is taught by the commandment of men
Revelation 10

 9So I went to the angel and asked him to give me the little scroll. He said to me, “Take it and eat it. It will turn your stomach sour, but in your mouth it will be as sweet as honey.” 10I took the little scroll from the angel’s hand and ate it. It tasted as sweet as honey in my mouth, but when I had eaten it, my stomach turned sour. 11Then I was told, “You must prophesy again about many peoples, nations, languages and kings.”

 

John 1:1 – “In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God.”

John 1:14 – “And the Word became flesh, and dwelt among us, and we beheld His glory, glory as of the only begotten from the Father, full of grace and truth.”

John 5:18 – “For this cause therefore the Jews were seeking all the more to kill Him, because He not only was breaking the Sabbath, but also was calling God His own Father, making Himself equal with God.”

John 8:24 – “I said therefore to you, that you shall die in your sins; for unless you believe that I am He, you shall die in your sins.”

 John 8:58 – “Jesus said to them, ‘Truly, truly, I say to you, before Abraham was born, I am.’”

Exodus 3:14 – “And God said to Moses, ‘I AM WHO I AM’; and He said, Thus you shall say to the sons of Israel, ‘I AM has sent me to you.’”

John 10:30-33 – “I and the Father are one.”  31 The Jews took up stones again to stone Him.  32 Jesus answered them, “I showed you many good works from the Father; for which of them are you stoning Me?”  33 The Jews answered Him, “For a good work we do not stone You, but for blasphemy; and because You, being a man, make Yourself out to be God.”

John 20:28 – “Thomas answered and said to Him, “My Lord and my God!”

Col. 2:9 – “For in Him all the fullness of Deity dwells in bodily form.”

Phil. 2:5-8 – “Have this attitude in yourselves which was also in Christ Jesus, 6 who, although He existed in the form of God, did not regard equality with God a thing to be grasped, 7 but emptied Himself, taking the form of a bond-servant, and being made in the likeness of men. 8 And being found in appearance as a man, He humbled Himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross.  9 Therefore also God highly exalted Him, and bestowed on Him the name which is above every name, 10 that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, of those who are in heaven, and on earth, and under the earth, 11 and that every tongue should confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father.”

Heb. 1:8 – “But of the Son He says, “Thy throne, O God, is forever and ever, and the righteous scepter is the scepter of His kingdom.”

Yesterday when my grandson Jackson came over he was so excited to tell me what he had learned in Sunday school that morning.  He told me all about how Jesus wants us to forgive each other and treat each other nicely, and I smiled at this foundational message that is so important to a child’s Christian development.  Jackson talked about liking Milestone Church and asked why I do not go to his church.  I explained how all Christians believe in Jesus Christ, but some of us pick different churches to go to.  He was happy with this response and took off to play outside with his friend, Aiden.  I sat there for a while after he had gone and wondered how we might explain to him one day about the difference between his mother’s religious preferences, as opposed to ours, and prayed that no matter what direction Jackson’s religious understanding takes him in, that he concentrate his efforts on developing a relationship with Christ, rather than adhering to any one particular religious denominational view.  This was a lesson that took me a long time to realize in my own life.

Having been raised in a Roman Catholic home, I was taught according to the rules and practices of that particular denomination.  Being Catholic had been a religious conviction passed on through the generations of my family on both sides, and no one ever really stopped to question or understand what it was they were actually accepting.  I am in no way putting down the Catholic church, or any other denomination, but what happens more frequently than not is that we accept our family’s religious title, whether it is Catholic, Protestant, Methodist, Baptist, or any of a large group of denominations that fall under the title of Christianity.  Without having full understanding of why we have accepted the denomination we often do one of two things.  We blindly follow the outline of the church rules, fulfilling obligations for fear of not being a good Christian, or we find no understanding within the chosen denomination and walk away from religion, feeling we just don’t fit it, or it doesn’t work for us.  I went through this process early in my adult life, and thankfully I persevered, with the Holy Spirit constantly nagging at me to find resolution.  I have come out on top, caring little about what label is placed on me in the form of a denomination because I choose to be a follower of Christ more than I choose to follow any particular Christian sect.  I am simply proud to call myself a Christian.

This message is not for those who find much comfort within their religious denomination, because that is absolutely wonderful  that they can find peace and understanding with their church family.  Instead, this is for those who are struggling because they do not accept all of the doctrine set out by a particular sect and have lost interest or faith.  The key to faith comes in developing a personal relationship with Christ.  It is about taking the time to learn about His life on Earth, while listening closely to the messages He wished for us to hear and learn from His ministry.  Each denomination of Christianity has developed a belief system based on their understanding of the Bible.  None of them, or us, get it totally right, or totally wrong.  It is interpretation.  Where one denomination may set many rules in place that keep the believers to a highly disciplined standard, others are more lenient in their interpretation of what Christ meant when He revealed things to all of us.  When we are comfortable in our chosen, or inherited,  religious order, it brings us peace and comfort.  But for those who do not see eye to eye on many issues of their inherited denomination it can cause them, or us, to walk away frustrated, confused, and feeling either unworthy of Christ, distanced from Him, or in the worst case scenario, it leaves the believer with a sour taste in their mouth over the issue of religion.  When we feel frustrated, confused, unworthy, distanced or bitter, the human response is to shy away, or walk away from the subject entirely.   This happens because, in our humanity, we confuse religion with faith.  We also confuse church with THE CHURCH.

A person can be an extremely religious person, holding very strictly to the doctrine and laws of their individual chosen denomination.  They can know scripture by heart, and adhere to every rule and obligation of their church.  They can tithe, and can offer hours upon hours of community service, and yet they may never reach a place where they develop a personal relationship with Christ.  They are trying to discipline themselves into being  a ‘good Christian’ by virtue of their obedience to a set of manmade rules and obligations.  If they do not believe these things based on a yearning deep within their heart, are only fulfilling obligation in order to become ‘heavenworthy’ and it becomes useless.  A simpler way of seeing this concept is to think of seeing an elderly woman trying to cross a main intersection.  A ‘religious’ person who acts out of obedience and obligation alone might go and offer assistance in order to ‘do the right thing’.  A faithful believer would offer assistance because they feel true compassion and a desire to help.  It is the desire and compassion to reflect His image that brings us to a place where we find Christ. True faith comes from a personal relationship with Him; where we can hear His voice in the absence of church doctrine, and even if it is in opposition to church doctrine. True faith tells us that no matter what the world perceives, we KNOW truth, because He has shown us truth.  We are answerable to Him, and our faithfulness is to Him, not to a particular religion.  Religion can guide us, encourage us, and bring us comfort and peace, but it can never be a replacement for a relationship with our Lord.  Where religion, headed by humanity might let us down sometimes, or where religious law might differ from our own belief system, we can go straight to Christ; and through our personal relationship, we can talk to Him and be guided to truth in His Word until we find the peace we need in order to separate Earthly understanding from Spiritual understanding.

I believe that for many, the fear of opposing or differing in any way from their particular denomination’s guidelines is due to the fact that we often confuse church with THE CHURCH.  THE CHURCH is the Body of Christ, encompassing  all of His followers, regardless of denomination,who desire to live in faithfulness to our Lord.  A church is simply a building that holds a group of believers who have come together to worship and celebrate all that Christ represents to them.  We must be very careful not to confuse the two because we can often become very loyal or disconnected with a church, depending on how close we feel their system represents our personal beliefs.  We can shy away from a church or embrace a church community,  yet we must remember that how we feel about a church should never affect our loyalty and faithfulness to THE CHURCH, which is not ministered by any priest, minister, or pastor, but Christ Himself. 

When I read my Bible, and see and hear the Words that my Lord speaks to me through the Gospels, I develop a deep and personal relationship with Him.  I cannot be taught what I need to learn from man, whether in a church, theology class, or by any church representative.  I can be advised, I can hear valuable facts, but my only Teacher, who will reveal all that I need to know will be God.  He has sent His Son, the Living Word, so that His Word might be understood and brought down through the ages through His Book.  He has given me the Holy Spirit, who is my counselor, and who helps me to find personal understanding of all that God wishes to be revealed to me.  I can stand in any church, or no church, and celebrate that I am a Christian; a follower of Christ, the One who leads me and guides me through my journey.  While having much respect for all denominations of Christianity, disagreeing or being unable to find comfort in any particular church is not a cause, or an excuse, to walk away from Christ.  We must search, and seek, through the pages of His Book, for that personal relationship that will always sustain us.  When we find it, it brings us to a place where our Christian denomination becomes secondary, because our desire is to call from the mountaintop that we are a Christian; we are from Christ, and will follow His lead home.  If I can offer my grandson one gift in life, it would be that I might show him my joy and excitement in finding Christ so that he can desire that same kind of relationship with Him.  Where he chooses to place his ‘religious’ affiliation, or what denomination of Christianity he chooses to find comfort and celebration in is up to him.  My greatest desire is that he develop a personal love and relationship with Christ where he will find a the spiritual food that nourishes deep within his very soul.  When that happens then I can rest knowing that he and the Lord will work together through this journey called life, to bring my Jackson home.  For this I pray, Lord Jesus Christ.

1 Corinthians 1

12Now this I say, that every one of you saith, I am of Paul; and I of Apollos; and I of Cephas; and I of Christ.

13 Is Christ divided? was Paul crucified for you? or were ye baptized in the name of Paul?

14I thank God that I baptized none of you, but Crispus and Gaius;

15Lest any should say that I had baptized in mine own name.

16And I baptized also the household of Stephanas: besides, I know not whether I baptized any other.

17For Christ sent me not to baptize, but to preach the gospel: not with wisdom of words, lest the cross of Christ should be made of none effect.

18For the preaching of the cross is to them that perish foolishness; but unto us which are saved it is the power of God.

Colossians 2:9-10

For in Christ all the fullness of the Deity lives in bodily form, and you have been given fullness in Christ, who is the head over every power and authority

Matthew 7:7

“Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you.

John  14:6

Jesus said to him, “I am the way, and the truth, and the life.  No one comes to the Father except through me.”

James 1:5

“If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all liberally and without reproach, and it will be given to him.”

Proverbs 2:6

“For the Lord gives wisdom; from His mouth come knowledge and understanding; He stores up sound wisdom for the upright …”

John 7:24

Trying to guide our children into making good choices and decisions in life is a great concern for most parents.  Of course we raise them with the best intentions, and pray that they stay out of trouble, but what about after that? The path our children’s lives take can cause us much joy or much heartache depending on their decisions, and sadly they often do not even realize the effect their decisions have on those close to them.  My sister’s son was a perfect example.  Despite my sister having such hopes and dreams for him, he chose not to go on to any higher learning; content to simply be a ‘blue collar worker.’  He fell in love with a wrong type of girl, and was so in love with her that despite finding out that she was pregnant with another man’s child, he still chose to marry her.  No matter how his family tried to convince him that this was asking for trouble, he would not change his mind about this girl. This disgraced their family and my sister worried that her son would be in for years of trouble with this girl.  She most likely worried over whether this girl would  be a good mother to her grandchildren, would she run off on her son one day, and certainly she worried over whether she would be able to treat this coming child as her own grandchild, knowing full well that the child was most likely not even her son’s.  My sister and her family were embarrassed, and wondered how their son’s self-esteem could be so low that he felt he couldn’t do any better.

After the child was born, my sister did her best to put the past behind her, and opened her heart  to her son’s new wife and this child.  Then sadly one day, seemingly out of nowhere,  this young couple decided to leave the area.   Without a word to anyone they simply picked up and left and my sister was heartbroken.  This girl was surely trouble, since she had taken my sister’s son far away, and was teaching him that he had no obligation to even let his family know  where he was going, or why he was going.   Had they left to simply start a new life where no one knew the history and would not ridicule their child?  Coming from a small town, this was a distinct possibility, because in a small town everyone seems to know everyone’s business.  She missed her son desperately and blamed her son’s choice of a marriage partner for taking him away from his family.  She had heard of women like this, and wondered if she was ever going to see her son again.  But thankfully, after a year or so, the young couple returned, obviously realizing the importance of family and that the grass is not always greener somewhere else.  Over time the past was forgotten, and all was well, but did these children ever realize the heartache they caused  my sister?  The girl thankfully went on to be a loyal, loving wife and mother, and the townspeople eventually stopped the murmurs of gossip, but I still wonder if my sister sometimes daydreams about how much better off her son would have been if he had chosen a marriage partner more wisely.

The reality of this little story is that the sister I speak about is my sister in Christ.  She is the mother of Joseph, the Earthly father of Jesus Christ.  I tell this story from what could have easily been her perception of what had transpired in her son’s life; and the pain, heartache, and shame she might have felt at his decisions.  Not knowing that her son had been called upon to be the Earthly father of our Savior, I am certain she was very upset to find out that her son was marrying a woman who was with child.  ‘What must he be thinking,’ she must have thought to herself.  Here the townspeople  had wished to stone Mary for her seemingly deplorable morals, and yet her son was choosing to save her from this, and was set on marrying this woman.  Certainly she felt her son was wasting his life on an immoral, wayward woman who would surely give her son nothing but grief. She, nor the townspeople had any idea that this girl was as pure as the driven snow, and had been chosen by God to bring our Lord into this world.  To add insult to injury, less than a year after this child was born, her son and his new family just picked up and left their small town.  Not a word of goodbye, and nothing to indicate why they were leaving, or where they were going.  Didn’t she, as Joseph’s mother deserve better in her son, she must have thought?  Wasn’t their small town good enough for this couple?  What about her son’s livelihood?  How was he going to provide for his family if he was just picking up and leaving the humble carpentry business he had built for himself?  Little did she know that an angel had come once again to tell Joseph to take his family to Egypt, to protect them.  Not knowing any of this, Joseph’s mother must have felt so much shame, and even when her son returned with his family, were they left dealing with the community shunning her grandchild, who had clearly been conceived out of the moral standard of the time?   Was this mother able to build any type of relationship with her daughter-in-law Mary while believing she was not a good moral woman?  Did she have resentment toward her for clouding her son’s vision of what he was meant to do with his life?  Most probably the answer is yes to all of these questions.  But we cannot blame her, because she did not know the truth behind her son’s actions.  Certainly she wouldn’t have believed him even if he had told her about the angel coming to him in his dream and telling him that Mary was carrying the Son of God.  Would she have believed her son if he had come and told her he and Mary were fleeing to Egypt with their Son, so that King Herod’s men could not take and kill the Savior, who had been sent to us for our salvation?  This mother would have thought her son had gone mad!  So instead she most probably was left feeling that her son had not realized his potential, and could have done much better for himself in life.  She was completely unaware that this whole time he was fulfilling a special duty that God had commissioned him with, and that duty was to protect the mother of the Christ-child, and raise God Himself, in the ways of righteousness, until he became a man, ready to go out and minister and heal the world.

Joseph’s family, Mary’s family, and all of the townspeople surely made judgements toward this special couple based on how they perceived life, the moral standards of the times, and their own personal set of values.  How wrong they were, for they did not even have a clue as to what was really going on in this situation!  Where we might feel badly that they must have judged Mary and Joseph, and even this poor child, who to the entire town was a child conceived out of  marriage, we are guilty of doing the very same thing every day.  How often do we comment out loud, or to ourselves on how much better someone could be doing in life if they just did things the way we think they should be done.  Who hasn’t met up with someone from their school days and taken personal note as to how successful, or ordinary, their life has turned out?  “Wow, I would have thought this person would have gone on to be a doctor, or lawyer, and been highly successful!” I know I have commented to myself.  Who hasn’t pulled up to a friend’s home and immediately taken notice of the neighborhood, the value of the homes, how well the lawn is kept, and the decorating choices of this person?  We are all guilty because we judge according to our own standards and our own priorities, never even stopping to think that the priorities of those we are judging may be very different than ours.  Many of us look at a woman and immediately take note of her clothing choices.  Is she dressing fashionably, or is she really dressing quite matronly for her age?  Are her clothes expensive or seemingly purchased at a resale shop?  How often have all of us women noted how beautiful another woman would be if they only dropped a few pounds, applied their makeup a little better, and added a few highlights to their hair? What about the couple who chooses to have more than the 2.5 children we all seem to believe is the appropriate number of children to have?  Havent many of us noted that maybe they could afford to live in a better area, a larger home, or have a newer car if they hadn’t decided to have so many children?  We do this every day, without even realizing it.  We have a set of standards and believe we are right, make judgements according to our own standard, without even knowing anything about the people, or how God is working in their life.  Maybe the woman who is a bit larger than the acceptable size 8 for our society could take an hour and work out so that we all feel better about her (sarcasm here!) How many times have we heard “There is no excuse for not exercising, since we all have a spare hour in our day.” Yet maybe this woman is comfortable in the body that God gave her, gets her exercise in the form of cleaning her home or gardening, and would rather spend that hour reading her Bible or helping her children with their homework.  Maybe those parents who have an abundance of children have chosen to live modestly in order to share their lives with children who they strongly believe they are called upon to bring into this world.  Maybe they aren’t even doing it for religious reasons, and instead, simply enjoy children, and having a large family. Yet we, in our own judgemental minds have decided that somehow these people have been living in the dark, having never heard of birth control, or are not practicing planned parenting the way WE believe it should work.

 So many examples of how we judge do not even begin to touch the mental judgements we make on people every day, much as the entire town judged Mary and Joseph so long ago.  Yet like them, we have absolutely no idea of how God is working in their lives, and never take a moment to even stop and think about it.  My prayer for today is that we might all remember how easy it is to judge others, and to make assumptions based on our own set of standards.  As we can see in how Joseph’s own mother and the entire town was so wrong in the assumptions they most probably made, let us be reminded that very little is how we perceive it.  Let us pray that as we hope the Lord is working in our own lives, He is also working in the lives of those around us.  He has hopes and dreams for all of us that far surpass our own, and the journey that every person takes is different.  The goal of life is never to achieve wealth, power, a beautiful body, or successful children.  Success and achievement rests in one thing, and one thing only.  That is with all of our stumbling, falling, earthly successes, and earthly failures that we achieve the ultimate success and achievement of finding our way onto a path that accepts Christ as our Savior, so that we can share fellowship with Him.  That is our only true purpose, and should be our only hope, prayer, and comment on another individuals life.  When we hope for that in ourselves and root for this for others, that is when we can say we have lived a life up to it’s potential, and have really made something  of ourselves…. The rest, it’s all gravy!  

Ecclesiastes 2:11 

 ”Yet when I surveyed all that my hands had done and what I had toiled to achieve, everything was meaningless, a chasing after the wind; nothing was gained under the sun.”

Ecclesiastes 12:13 

 ”Now all has been heard; here is the conclusion of the matter: Fear God and keep his commandments, for this is the whole duty of man.”

Colossians 2:2-3 

 ”My purpose is that they may be encouraged in heart and united in love, so that they may have the full riches of complete understanding, in order that they may know the mystery of God, namely, Christ, in whom are hidden all the “treasures” of wisdom and knowledge.” 

Do not judge by appearances, but judge with right judgment.”

Luke 6:37

“Judge not, and you will not be judged; condemn not, and you will not be condemned; forgive, and you will be forgiven

Romans 2:1-3

Therefore you have no excuse, O man, every one of you who judges. For in passing judgment on another you condemn yourself, because you, the judge, practice the very same things. We know that the judgment of God rightly falls on those who practice such things. Do you suppose, O man—you who judge those who practice such things and yet do them yourself—that you will escape the judgment of God?

The funniest things come out of the mouths of innocent children.  Yesterday morning I brought my mother-in-law to the kitchen table to sit and enjoy Jackson coloring his Easter eggs.  It has been many, many years since she has gotten to witness this fun-filled activity that young children look forward to each and ever year.  While sitting with them, and watching Jackson move his eggs from one colored solution to the next, I asked him if he could tell me what we celebrate on Easter.  “I know Grammie,” he said.  “It means that Jesus died on the Cross for us.”  “Actually, Jackson” I corrected,”Jesus died on Good Friday, two days before Easter.  On Easter day we celebrate that Jesus came back to life.”  I went on to explain to him that Jesus died, and everyone was sad until He came back on Easter Sunday to show us that we do not die forever.  I told him how Jesus came back to tell us the special message that if we love Him, and try to listen to His rules, that when we die, just like Him, we can come back to a different life in Heaven where we can never die again.  “Good thing I’m only six,” Jackson answered.  “I won’t die for a long, long time, till I’m really old.  Not like GreatGrandma,” he went on, “she is going to go to Heaven really, really quick.”  I didn’t even know what to say, since GreatGrandma was sitting right there.  Talk about an awkward moment, as my mind raced to find something to say that might make light of this uncomfortable situation. Before I could come up with anything, GreatGrandma fixed it for me!  Bless her heart, at 85 years old she burst out laughing. “Jackson, you are a funny little boy,” she said.  “But you are right. GreatGrandma is old, and her body is tired,” she explained. “Soon I will get to go see GreatGrandpa and my Mommy in Heaven. They are there, waiting for me.”  

What an amazingly special moment between Jackson and his great-grandmother.  Here I was able to see the stark difference between young life, and a life that is old, and tired.  GreatGrandma had shared with Jackson her acceptance of his harsh words he had unknowingly blurted out, and in answer had shown him so much faith in God.  Her explanation that she was not frightened, and instead was looking forward to what would come had taught him a lesson that I never could have instilled in him in the way an old person can.  As soon as Jackson’s comment had come out of his mouth, while trying to stifle my own laughter over his innocent fact of reality, I was wishing to smooth over the moment.  I was worried that Jackson’s words might have hurt my mother-in-law, or frightened her with the reality that her days are quite numbered.  How silly I was being.  I was thinking in a way that did not even give her credit for being very aware of her own age or the frailty of her mortality.  To Jackson it was basic math.  He is young, she is very old.  It is as simple as that, and while I was trying to smooth it over, both young and old took the reins on this one and found such beautiful resolution and understanding. 

When we let go and stop worrying about everything, it is amazing how God steps in and makes such beautiful things happen.  I had been quite concerned when I had taken my mother-in-law in to live with us.  Would it be too noisy, I wondered?  I feared that Jackson’s vivacious, seemingly never-ending energy might be too much for an old lady.  Would she be bored or upset to occasionally forgo her soap operas, or game shows (that she usually sleeps through anyway) in order to sit through Nick Jr, and the Disney Channel?  On the other end of the spectrum I wondered if Jackson would have patience for GreatGrandma’s slow walk across the floor using her walker.  Would her occasional tears over missing her late husband, or children who live in other states, frighten him?  Would he resent the time I needed to now use caring for GreatGrandma when previously I had devoted all of my time and energy to him?  I now am appalled at what my concerns were.  I gave neither of them credit for all that is good in both of them, and gave God far too little credit for how He works in all of us.  God has taken two people who are at completely opposite places in their lives, and has built a beautiful bridge.  GreatGrandma adores her only great-grandchild; an addition to her wonderful family that before coming here had simply signaled another great milestone in her life.  She had lived to have children, grandchildren, and now a great-grandchild.  But it was a great-grandchild she not only did not know, but probably thought she would never come to know.  Jackson knew of GreatGrandma only as Papa’s Mommy, who lived in Florida and was very, very old.  In choosing to take my mother-in-law into our family home, two lives that have so much to offer each other have come together.  GreatGrandma’s laughter and joy in everything Jackson does reminds me all the time that if she were in a nursing home, she would be missing out on so much happiness.  She has become younger, and her memory has improved.  She knows when Jackson is due home, and will often ask where he is if Jackson and my son are late coming home from school.  Where before time of day was really of no consequence to her, she now knows when Jackson is coming home, when it is time for Jackson to eat, and when it is time for Jackson to go to bed.  When Jackson goes across the street to play with his friend, she will ask when he might be coming home and will watch the clock, patiently waiting for him to return.  How she must treasure receiving the long forgotten  gift of a kiss goodnight from a small child,  or that special feeling of knowing how much she is loved.  She is thriving.  Jackson’s life has been enriched even more, and the lessons that God is teaching him, through GreatGrandma are endless.  He is learning that there is beauty in old people.  He is seeing how we all help her with the chores that have now become difficult for her, and I watch him hold the center of her walker to keep it still when she is getting up from her chair.  I see him quietly go over to her and kiss her hand so as not to disturb her when she is resting, and he will choose a quiet game to play until she wakes.  He is learning compassion.  He is learning to give of himself, and to help those who cannot do everything for themselves.  He has learned that the television is not only his, and is glad to share his television time between his shows and GreatGrandma’s.  Where before he could watch whatever he wanted, whenever he wanted, he now might come in while GreatGrandma is in the middle of watching a movie, and must wait.  He sits at the table eating his breakfast or dinner, and the two of them find so much to talk about.  Jackson tells GreatGrandma all of the Spanish words he is learning in school, and will often sing a song he has learned in his Spanish classes.  GreatGrandma thinks he is the next smartest thing to Einstein for his efforts, and his audience could not be more caught up on his every word.  She thinks he is wonderful, and he thinks she is wonderful.

Had I not chosen to take my mother-in-law in, none of this would be happening.  Where my decision can be seen by some as a good deed,  or fulfilling a much dreaded responsibility of children toward their parents,  God has shown that He has a specific reason for why He wishes for us to be faithful to Him..  It allows Him to do what He does best in pouring forth so much beauty, love and joy into things that in our humanity we would never be able to accomplish.  God does not wish for us to care for the elderly simply to show servitude.  It was never meant to be a chore.  It is a gift to everyone whose lives it touches, for in following His will He has opened GreatGrandma’s world, my world, and Jackson’s world.  He has softened Jackson’s heart  through his love for his new GreatGrandma, and in it softening, it becomes play-doh for God.  Now he can mold Jackson into one of His own,  through teaching Him compassion, love, tolerance, and selflessness in a spirit that now is familiar to these feelings.

I think on what Jackson said about Grandma going to Heaven quickly, and realize that where I wished to fix this ‘thoughtless’ statement from an innocent child, I need to sit back and stop trying to fix things.  God had a plan here, and a memorable lesson for Jackson.  It brought laughter to GreatGrandma and showed Jackson to not fear death.  It showed Him the face of God in GreatGrandma knowing where she would go, and how happy she would be to see those who she now misses so much. Most of all it taught Jackson the great power of God’s love.  Later that day I found a small rosary in Grandma’s possessions that I was going through.  I brought it to her and she called Jackson over, in order to give it to him.  She explained what it was, and told him to cherish it for always.  That silly little boy walked right into my bedroom, picked up one of my precious ‘Grandma’ figurines from my bedside table, and came walking back into the family room.  He kissed GreatGrandma’s cheek, and said “here, this is for you”, as he looked at me and winked.  I might have lost a figurine that day, but I know for sure that we all gained a child of God.  Father, you are awesome!

Job 32:7

 “Age should speak; advanced years should teach wisdom.”

 

Isaiah 48:17

Thus says the Lord, Your Redeemer, the Holy One of Israel: “I am the Lord your God, who teaches you to profit, who leads you by the way you should go.”

 

Matthew 19:14

Jesus said, “Let the little children come to me.”

 

Proverbs 16:9

 ”A man’s heart plans his way, but the Lord directs his steps.”

 

Psalms 71:9

Cast me not off in the time of old age; forsake me not when my strength faileth.

As I sit thinking about my Lord’s walk to His death that sad Friday, I have such mixed feelings.  I inwardly cringe at the absolute cruelty and violence of His death, and yet I know that without it, I would have no hope for salvation.  As I think upon how He was whipped, it was worse than we could even imagine.  While our civilized minds that can barely even comprehend such brutality envision a whip as we know it today, the whips used in those days had five or six ‘braids’ with metal balls or spiked bone attached to the ends.  I do not even wish to think upon the pain He must have endured, as in human cruelty He was beat beyond human endurance.  He then literally ‘carried the weight of the world’s sins upon His back’ as He carried His own death instrument, the Cross, to the place of His crucifixion at Calvary on Place of the Skull.  Even Christ, in His human form, could barely carry this heavy weight, as a farmer, Simon the Cyrene was ordered to help Him that last distance.

How can I celebrate such cruelty? It was the most horrible act in the history of the world, and yet the greatest gift from God. Though I know it was done as the perfect sacrifice for my sins, I can never find comfort in being glad for this.  Instead, I am sad that every human sin needed to be wrought upon my Lord, so that He might absorb the flaws of our humanity.  It was as if a dark cloud came upon the Earth, and particles of every sin that was ever committed and every sin that would ever happen after had come and surrounded Him, so that He could take them up with Him to the Cross.  Had He not anticipated this it would have been horrible enough, but He knew that this was what was to come to Him at the close of His ministry.  In Mark 9:30-32 it tells us 30 And they departed thence, and passed through Galilee; and he would not that any man should know it. 31 For he taught his disciples, and said unto them, The Son of man is delivered into the hands of men, and they shall kill him; and after that he is killed, he shall rise the third day. 32 But they understood not that saying, and were afraid to ask him.   Again He warned them in Matthew 20:17-22.  Now they were in the way going up to Jerusalem, and Jesus was going on before them. And they were astonished, and those following Him were afraid. And He again took the twelve disciples apart and began to tell them the things that were about to happen to Him. And He said to them, “Behold, we go up to Jerusalem: and all the things which have been written by the prophets shall be fulfilled in the Son of man. For He shall be delivered to the chief priests and the scribes, and they shall condemn Him to death, and shall deliver Him up to the Gentiles. And they shall mock Him, and shall spit upon Him, and shall scourge Him, and shall treat Him shamefully, and crucify Him: and on the third day, He shall be raised up. And they understood none of these things; and this saying was hidden from them, and they did not comprehend the things that were said.”

He knew the path His Earthly life would take.  He patiently waited to begin His ministry as shown at the wedding feast at Canna.  Here Mary came to her Son, wanting His help since the wine had been finished and there is no more left for the guests.  John 2 tells us that Jesus responded to His mother’s request saying “Woman, how does this concern of yours affect me? My hour has not yet come.”  He had a plan, a perfectly orchestrated set of events that would lead to His ministry and ultimate covering of the sins of humanity.  Yet here, Jesus honors His mother’s wishes in obedience to her, while reminding her that His works need to be done in a deliberate manner.  He knew all along the path His life would take, and though He was the Son of God, the One Living Word; in His humanity He knowingly endured a death that was preceded by mocking, ridicule, people spitting in His face, and a world that did not believe, and ran away in fear for their own preservation. 

Though I am eternally grateful for what He did for me in death, I cannot ever bring myself to celebrate Good Friday.  While the Christian world celebrates this day as the ultimate gift to a sinful world, I am shamed that my nature forced this upon Him so that He might be able to share fellowship with what He had created.  I can never change that I am human.  I can never change that in my humanity I am flawed, and am a sinner.  But if I wish to make His death have meaning I can choose to live in the Spirit.  I can hand my life over to the One who has ultimate control; the One who can make me white as snow to Him.  I can remember each and every day that only He can mend my brokenness, only He can take the weight of the world that rested on His back in the Cross, and lift it high into the Heavens where we can share in His resurrection to a life that never ceases. 

Jesus, my dear Lord, I pray I would have been the one to wipe your brow on your walk to the Cross.  I know that this was done in fulfillment of the Scriptures, but had I been there, I pray I would have wished to stand tall and scream for them to stop.  I pray I would have wished to help you carry the Cross and ease your suffering, and I pray that I would have begged to be crucified right next to you, to show the world that I wish to die to sin, and live IN you.  But on Good Friday I am so clearly reminded that I have the benefit of knowing how this all ended.  In my humanity I am frail, and as tears roll down my cheeks I know I most probably would not have, for if it were to be, I would have been there standing up for you.  So like all of those there, I am a hopeless sinner, who through You have been given hope, a future, and salvation.  So what  I can do now is celebrate your love for me.  I can let your Kingdom reign within my heart, and I can rest in knowing that in my great love for you, you have covered my sins. May you live in me today and always, and may I be a vessel for your love to be spread to all of humanity. In that way, your death will not be in vain, but will yield the greatest of harvests.  For this I pray.

Today is my sister Linda’s 54^th birthday.  Until now there hasn’t been any mention of Linda in any of my writings because my feeling run so deep that she deserves a short story dedicated just to her life.  But in honor of her birthday, I feel compelled to introduce this special person in my life today.  Linda, who we all prefer to call Linny, is my big sis.  She is the firstborn child in our family of nine children, and I believe Linny was sent directly from Heaven as a special gift to us.  You see, Linny is severely handicapped.  As a small child Linny appeared perfectly ‘normal’.  She was beautiful, with long flowing auburn hair, bright blue eyes, and sun-kissed freckles on a face that always seemed to be smiling.  She ran and played along with her younger sisters, including me, and we never saw her as any different.  But as we grew, we started realizing that Linny was a little different.  She went from being the big sis, to taking on the role of the protected sister, as if we were older than she was.  The reason for this was because Linny was retarded.  Not severely, but enough so that as her younger sisters progressed in maturity and reasoning, Linny stayed much on the level of a four or five-year old. 

I recall asking my mother why, if God does not make mistakes, was Linny made wrong?  My mother’s response resonates in my mind to this day.  She explained to me that God knew that she was going to have a large family, with many siblings for Linny.  Linny had been given to us, Mom said, to show a multitude of people, in us, and through us, that we all need compassion, love, and tolerance.  Mom said that although Linny’s handicaps were more visible to the world, we all had handicaps that we needed to learn how to accept and work with.  This explanation was accepted so easily by us, and we just continued on, loving Linny, and treating her the same as we did the others, and I never realized the full meaning of what my mother had said until much later in life.

As Linny grew, I recall helping my big sis with her ‘homework’ from the special school she went to for special needs children.  I was the younger sister helping my big sis, and we loved to celebrate as Linny would take turns writing us letters, and she always signed them the same.  A backward ‘L’ ove,  backward ‘L’ again, inba.   It was her treasured trademark signature.  Not having much money we had two bicycles for us to share.  All of us shared one, while we left the other for Linny, because she loved to ride her bicycle.  I remember valiantly defending Linny to cruel children who thought it funny to make fun of her being retarded, and all of us became very protective over our special sister.

Then as Linny grew into the very start of adolescence, she started falling a lot.  After a particularly bad fall that required stitches, she went to the doctor, where she was sent to a specialist.  The diagnosis was not good.  Where Linny’s pediatrician had diagnosed her as retarded, it seemed Linny’s issues ran deeper.  What she had was called spastic paraplegia, a condition where her muscles were dying.  It had apparently affected her brain either before birth, or early on after birth, limiting her mental capacity to that of maybe a 6-year-old.  Unfortunately it was starting to affect other muscles now, and her leg muscles were literally atrophying and dying day by day.  The prognosis was very bleak, and the specialist had to explain to my parents that at the rate this disease usually progresses, we would be lucky if Linny lived to see her 18^th birthday.  I remember Mom and Dad coming home from this appointment with Linny, and I knew something was badly wrong.  I could just sense it in Mom and Dad’s demeanor.  Over time they explained this to us, and we all cherished our remaining time with our special gift from God.  As Linny adapted to braces on her legs, we adapted.  Then Linny needed a walker, and then finally a wheelchair.  Gone were the days of watching Linny ride her red bicycle, but from her permanent chair she has taught me so very much about life, love, and God.

I will save the specific’s about Linny’s life for a book of its own one day, but I write about her today to honor her birthday and to be reminded that God is always in control.  With a death sentence in hand for the past 36 years, Linny celebrates her 54^th birthday today.   It tells me that God not only is always in control, it tells me so clearly that Linny had such purpose in life.  Where others might have seen Linny as sad, or a person to be pitied, Linny was not.  Linny has always retained the innocence of a child that God so dearly hopes that we can retain.  She cares nothing of clothing, fine jewels, money, or anything this world can offer.   All she ever wanted was for people to love her, and to bring joy into the lives of those around her, and she did that a million times over.  When Mom and Dad passed away, it created a situation we had never anticipated in Linny outliving her parents.  Instead of shying away from the burden, many of us actually argued over who would be allowed to take Linny into our homes.  It was an honor and a privilege.  Suzie won out, because she was closest to her, and though I was upset not to have her at the time, it warms my heart that so many of us truly wanted her to come join our own growing families.

Unfortunately, Linny is now living in a nursing home where she has lived for the past six years.  Bringing her there to live was a hard decision; one that laid very heavy on Suzie’s heart, but we knew Suzie would never do that unless it was necessary.  She had been forced to finally acknowledge that Linny’s worsening medical conditions could no longer be addressed or supported in a home environment, so that sad day had finally come.   Now, living so far away, I cannot go see her as often as I would like, but I think of her all the time and wear a bracelet to remind myself of her each and every day.  My brothers go to see her all the time, and bring their children so that they too can learn humility, love, kindness, and compassion through Linny.  My one brother’s children speak of Linny with so much love and adoration that I know for sure that God is still allowing Linny to work her magic.

Having been giving the blessing of my dear sister I realize that in Linny’s  life on Earth,  though her outward appearance may show the world her handicaps, within her there is nothing but the perfection of God.  It is the rest of us, with beautiful, perfectly working exteriors,  who hold the true handicaps we must overcome.  Through Linny’s beautiful shining blue eyes, I always see the face of the Lord and am reminded of just how awesome He is.  Everything important to us here is of no importance in the big picture. Nothing here is as it seems, and we must always look through the eyes of the Spirit to find true meaning.   May I always be thankful for Linny in our midst, for she is the one who has carried the Cross of her disabilities in order to show the world what lies within.  I spent half of my life so happy and honored to help her and guide her.  Yet inside I am sure Linny smiles;  for she and God both know that it is she who has helped and guided me.  I love you Linny, and may we celebrate not only your birthday today, but celebrate your life.

Jeremiah 29:11
“For I know the plans I have for you,” says the Lord. “They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope.”

Matthew 18:2-6

And calling to him a child, he put him in the midst of them and said, “Truly, I say to you, unless you turn and become like children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. Whoever humbles himself like this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven. “Whoever receives one such child in my name receives me, but whoever causes one of these little ones who believe in me to sin, it would be better for him to have a great millstone fastened around his neck and to be drowned in the depth of the sea.

John 7:24

Do not judge by appearances, but judge with right judgment.”

 

An amazing quote:

“What lies behind us & what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us.” -Ralph Waldo Emerson

My greatest hope in writing under the title of If Not For Sunday has been to help all of us to understand that living a life that is guided by the Lord, and trying to conform to the image of Christ is both a daily privilege and a chosen battle.  Raised under basic traditional religious beliefs, I never understood this; leading my own steps with the common sense I believed I possessed to get me through my life. Going to Church on Sundays was the most common expression of outward Christianity, as I tried to discipline myself to obey the Commandments that God had given to all of us.  Although I did my best to live in obedience, something so major was missing that I felt I lost.  It was as if I didn’t belong where I was living, not sure if the disconnect was in my geography, the period of time I was born in, or the people I had chosen to walk the path with me in my life.  Time and prayer has shown me that my gut feeling was right.  I have learned that though I live on this Earth, I do not want to fit into a world that can sometimes be harsh, cruel and so very different from what God wishes for it to be.  Through sin, we all have made this world a place where we suffer and struggle to find the way onto the path that God has given to us in order to find salvation.  Yet where doors close, my loving God does truly open a window.  Through sin, humanity has closed the door on our ability to find fellowship with God, and yet God loves us so much that He opened that window to allow us to see into the spirit through Jesus Christ, the Living Word of God.  When we choose to explore what lies through that window we find our way home.  We find that place where we belong, and where we feel things make sense to us.  The only  way to reach that place is to make the choice to live in the Spirit rather than the flesh.  Once this choice is made, we cannot simply say we acknowledge the Trinity, are grateful for all that is given to us, and go worship them at church on Sundays.  It is a life changing choice that requires daily perseverance that slowly but surely changes our thoughts and actions to better reflect where we choose to come from. In that way we are free to rest in Him on Sundays, since we are not trying to push in a weeks  worth of hopes, dreams and obedience all into one day My choice to open my personal life to all of my readers reflects my hope that through my journey, and all that is slowly revealed to me, we can all grow in faith.  Everyone needs a guide, a mentor, or just someone there to let us know we are not alone.  I have had numerous people take on that role in my life, and it is my hearts desire to pay it forward, helping others as we walk this great and wonderful journey together.

Yesterday  was a day of much hurting for me.  I share this so that we all understand that sometimes life hurts.  Just because I have chosen to walk the path that follows Christ, it does not give me any immunity to the hurts and pains we all experience.  The specifics of the story are not relevant, and would only disclose things that others may not wish for me to share, but suffice it to say that I had tried my best to do a kind and noble deed for someone, and today it not only backfired in my face, but allowed me to feel taken advantage of.  No appreciation for what I had done was offered,  no gratitude, and actually I was made to feel like a fool for trying to live in the Spirit, in a world that is often self-serving.  In my humanity, I became very angry.  I began crying and was soon caught up in a small self-indulgent window of feeling quite sorry for myself.  I was tired of doing the right thing, and was tired of trying my best, only to have it thrown in my face by those who choose to just take and take from this world. I told myself I had to stop looking at the world through rose-colored glasses, since it was clear I had simply become a doormat for others to brush the mud off of their feet.  As you can tell, I was spitting mad, and hurting.  For quite a few hours I was caught up in human anger, feeling I was the victim of selfishness, and I vowed to stop being the sucker that I am in always trying to help others, only to get hurt in the end.  I was done.

As the day wore on, my anger increased, and I truly did not like the way I was feeling. Angry, bitter, and even a bit vengeful,  all of the emotions and characteristics I wish not to possess  were passing through me. Finally I just stopped and took a minute to ask the Holy Spirit to help me find resolution to this.  I was frustrated because I do not wish to be like those who live only understanding their own needs, and putting themselves first. But how was I to continue living a life that somehow managed to keep slapping me in the face despite my best efforts?  I sat and prayed about it, and the truth was revealed to me.

 I realized that I cannot become angry at those who are still young in their understanding of Spirituality.  I was probably there once as well, and today I am not all grown up in my understanding either.  Becoming angry at a person for working in the flesh is condemning them for being human, weak, and a sinner.  I realized that I can never be a victim, or feel sorry for myself, so long as I my actions reflect what I truly believe is right and good.  A victim is someone who has things happen beyond their control, suffers from it, and is left with scars from their unfortunate situation.  When I choose to act in a manner that reflects what I know to be truth and a call from God, I am in control, because I have chosen to walk with Christ, and this ultimately puts Him in control.   No matter how many times goodwill might be thrown back in my face, do I really suffer?  No, because I should not be doing whatever I have chosen to do for the personal satisfaction or glory.  The glory belongs to God, and God alone.  My satisfaction should be in knowing I am reflecting His image, not in the response from others, even the one who directly benefits from my assistance.  I should not be acting in the Spirit for the appreciation, for the good name and reputation it might cause me, or for any reason other than to reflect His glory. If that was done, no one can ever take that away. Humanity’s response can never change Truth, and that it is a reflection of God.

So I ask myself, would I do it over again, if I knew that I would have received absolutely no appreciation for my actions?  Would I do it over again knowing I would appear a sucker to many who know what happened?  Would I shy away from it so that I do not feel a victim of humanity?  After visiting with the Holy Spirit on this I know that I would certainly do it over again, so I can never be a victim if it would be my desire to repeat this. Instead of hardening my heart, and taking an eye for an eye, what I know I need to practice is patience and understanding toward those whose response may not always be what I believe it should be.  After all, the Holy Spirit certainly still has His hands full with me, when I still struggle with my own responses to situations. Thankfully He is patient with me, so I must practice this same patience if I wish to reflect His full image.  In condemning those who do not respond the way I believe they should, I condemn myself, because I am not perfect in my own humanity.  I see that when my motive for acting in the Spirit is to reflect His glory, then no one on this planet can ever take that glory away.  I think about Jesus’ own walk, the walk of John the Baptist, Paul, Peter,and so many greater than I who have come in the name of God. Those people were not always appreciated for their actions, and they too offered everything they did to the glory of God.  So whenever I feel like the responses of humanity are frustrating, I need to remind myself that I am in good company.  I have a choice.  I choose to walk a path that reflects His image and His glory, while remaining  aware and prayerful of the weaknesses of humanity, because I share that weakness.  I can never be a victim so long as I walk with Him.

Lord, today I thank you for showing me that what I do, I do for your Glory, and not a pat on the back.  If I wish to reflect your image I must stay steadfast in my commitment to showing your face to those who need to see you most.  When the response is not what I expect,  I should never become disheartened, or lose faith, but instead must be reminded that this is the exact reason you ask me to shine Your light.  Each person comes to you at a different time and place and somewhere at one point it was someone else showing me Your face that changed my heart.  Was I thankful at that time?  Did I remember to show gratitude?  Probably not.  May I be more tolerant of those who have not yet found the peace that I find living in Your Word, always mindful that I have not achieved perfection either.  Where I am hurt, may I be reminded that I sometimes hurt others in my own humanity, and when I choose to reflect your image, may I find peace in knowing the world is just a little bit brighter for me having reflected Your Glory once again. For this I pray Lord Jesus Christ.

Hebrews 6

 7Land that drinks in the rain often falling on it and that produces a crop useful to those for whom it is farmed receives the blessing of God.

Romans 10

3 For they being ignorant of God’s righteousness, and seeking to establish their own righteousness, have not submitted to the righteousness of God. 4 For Christ is the end of the law for righteousness to everyone who believes.

Matthew 5:16

“Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father which is in heaven

Matthew 5:39

 If someone strikes you on the right cheek, turn to him the other also.

Romans 8:29

“For whom He did foreknow, He also did predestinate to be conformed to the image of His Son.”   

Luke 11:33

 “No man, when he hath lighted a candle, putteth it in a secret place, neither under a bushel, but on a candlestick, that they which come in may see the light. The light of the body is the eye [the mind]: therefore, when thine eye is single [minded], thy whole body also is full of light; but when thine eye is evil [corrupted], thy body also is full of darkness. Take heed, therefore, that the light which is in thee be not darkness [quenched]. If thy whole body, there-fore, be full of light, having no part dark, the whole shall be full of light, as when the bright shining of a candle doth give thee light.”

One of the hardest hurdles to get past in our relationship with God is letting go of what I like to call ‘head faith.’  We love God, accept Jesus as our Savior, listen for the voice of the Holy Spirit, and yet we always want to remain in control.  How often have you wanted something so badly that you call out “God, if you could just do this for me.”  Whether it is something small or something quite large, in our frustrations it is easy for us to feel alone, crying out “if you could just give me a sign, or show me that you are with me.”  I have done this many times.  We all wish for that assurance that He is present in our lives, and working for our good.  We forget two basic things when doing this.  One is that He has an entirely different agenda than we do.  Where we see everything from a human perspective, He sees the overall picture.  We wish to not worry, not hurt, and have a stress and pain free life here on Earth.  He cares only about one thing, and that is helping us to find Him.  Often that happens in our darkest times, and when we are worrying, hurting, or suffering that is when we reach out to seek the only One who can ease our suffering. 

Imagine the scenario of you and a dear friend taking a nice relaxing walk through town.  A car comes racing around the corner and is heading right toward your friend, who has begun to cross the road.  You call out to your friend, and run, pushing him or her out of harms way, and yet sadly, the car hits you.  You suffer severe bodily harm and remain in the hospital for months recuperating, and going through a strenuous rehabilitation process before finally healing from the damage sustained in the accident.  Weeks later you are sitting with this dear friend sharing valued time together, when he or she asks to borrow some money.  This friend becomes quite upset with you when you are unable to help with this, and storms away, angry that you have not been able to supply their needs at the moment.  It would appear that you have found yourself a very ungrateful friend, I would think.  Here you saved your dear friends life, and yet when their very next time their needs were not met by you, the relationship was compromised.  Unfortunately we do this to our Lord fairly frequently.  Each and every time we have a need, we come to Him, asking for His help.  When things work out, we are so warm and fuzzy in our faithfulness to Him, and yet the minute something happens in our lives that causes us pain or concern, we are right back asking Him for help, and requiring that He ‘prove’ Himself to us once again by fixing it for us.  When this does not happen to our liking we question His role in our lives, His very existence, and His faithfulness to us.  Yes, as horrible as it sounds, the truth is, we require Him to be faithful to us and our needs, rather than turning our entire lives over to Him in ‘life faith.’

Jesus Christ came to teach us the path that His Father wishes for us to travel on, and gave up His life for our salvation, so that we might share eternity with Him.  During His ministry His disciples and many others witnessed Jesus performing so many miracles.  Yet even high rulers who had witnessed these miracles requested that Jesus perform still more miracles to show that He was who He claimed to be.  They wished for assurance, and wanted Jesus to ‘perform’, much like a magician would, in order to show that He was, in fact, the Son of God.  When He refused, they condemned Him a blasphemer of God, and sentenced Him to death.

What is so telling of our ‘head faith’ is that even the Apostles and the soldiers lived in it, needing constant reminders, and things to be shown to them.  On the night before He died, in the darkness of night, the soldiers of the high priests came to arrest Jesus.  Standing behind the Apostle Judas, the soldiers watched as Judas approached Jesus, offering him a kiss as he called out ‘Greetings, teacher’.  This sign from Judas told the soldiers which of the men standing before them was the One who claimed to be Christ, the Son of God.  They had come to arrest Him, and as they attempted to arrest Jesus, Peter brought up his sword, slicing the ear off of one of the soldiers.  Jesus rebuked Peter, saying ‘Put your sword back into its place; for all who take the sword will perish by the sword. ⁵³Do you think that I cannot appeal to my Father, and he will at once send me more than twelve legions of angels? ⁵⁴But how then would the scriptures be fulfilled, which say it must happen in this way?’ (Matthew 26:52-54).  Then He walked over and healed the ear of the soldier named Malchus.

I ask myself why these soldiers, who had just witnessed a miracle from Jesus in that His simple touch could heal a man clearly bleeding profusely from having his ear severed, did not have a change of heart?  Why didn’t they fall to their knees realizing who they were dealing with?  Yet they arrested Him and took Him away.  We have the Apostles, who loved Christ so very much, and had seen him perform so many miracles, and had now, most recently, seen Him heal the severed ear of the soldier.  Yet even after witnessing all that they had witnessed, they questioned.  “Why can He not save Himself” they wondered, and Peter, who loved Christ so very much, actually denied knowing Him for fear that He would be harmed.  No matter how much these people had seen, they were all waiting for Christ to fix things in a way that appealed to their human understanding.  Little did they know at the time, but Jesus WAS fixing things, but in a manner that was so beyond our scope of understanding. 

After Jesus was crucified, died and was buried, He rose from the dead in fulfillment of the Scriptures.  He appeared to His disciples, and they questioned that this could even be possible.  Thomas even asked to see His hands, with the holes that proved the path that He had taken, and the void in Christ’s side giving witness to where He had been pierced with a spear while hung on the Cross.  What would it take for Jesus to finally get it through their heads that He was the Son of God?  Had these Apostle’s all not witnessed the multitude of miracles He had performed during His ministry? Had He not told them that He would be taken away that night in the garden?  Did He not foretell that Peter would deny Him three times?  And had they not witnessed the healing of the soldier’s severed ear?  Now He has returned to them after rising from the dead, and still there are questions?

I recall that when I initially read about Christ returning and Thomas questioning the validity of whether or not this was in fact Christ,  Him showing Thomas His hands and side was very perplexing to me.  Where Thomas needed to see for himself that Christ still bore witness to the physical damage He had suffered in being crucified, I was surprised that these scars were still present.  Wasn’t Christ healed through death?  Wasn’t His body new and unmarked from all that living had done to Him?  In thinking this through I found understanding.  Still bearing these scars not only was allowed for so that Thomas could finally accept and understand through visibly seeing that this could not be an imposter, but God, through Christ, was teaching these Apostles and the world His most precious message.  That message is that in Christ completely overcoming death, and standing before these men with holes that did not bleed, and a void in his side would be impossible for man to even be standing  there with,  all things are possible with God.  There is nothing, even when it completely defies and goes against all the laws that we know to be true and necessary to sustain life, that is beyond the ability of God to control.

So ask yourself today, what is it that Christ still needs to do to finally convince you that He loves you, and that everything He does and hopes for is in our best interest?  Is it that new car?  Is it a stable job, or a new pair of shoes?  Maybe better health, or winning the lottery?  No matter what it is, once He has performed His ‘magical tricks’ to your satisfaction, will that be all?  Or will there be something next?  It is time we let go, and stop making our faithfulness and trust in Him contingent on anything going on in our lives.  Did Jesus not know that He could ask His father to send  12 legions of angels to save Him from the crucifixion He knew He was to endure?  He could have, but He did not do this, because He was faithful and trusted that His Father would supply His needs, handling matters in a manner that might not make sense to man, but was for the good of all mankind. Had Jesus begged His Father to take it from Him, and God listened, to ‘prove’ Himself, not one of us would be saved.  Had Jesus saved Himself, and fought those who came to arrest Him, would we have ever found salvation?  And why is it that when we read about the friend who walked away from the person who had thrown themselves in front of a moving car to save them,  do we not see ourselves?  When we asked Jesus how very much He loved us, He stretched out His arms and died.  What more do we require?

Dear Lord, please give me the strength and faithfulness to let go of the control over my life.  Let me know in good times and in bad that You are always working for good in my life.  The things that my Earthly body might perceive as important may not be what You know I need, or are in accordance with Your plan, so let me always trust that Your ways are best.  You took up the Cross for me, to allow me to share in Your salvation, and have nothing more to show me, or prove to me to receive my faithfulness. Take the wheel in my life, and guide me to release myself to Your care, knowing that when I let you guide my steps, I will always be walking according to Your will.  I may not always see the fruits of my effort right away, and I may not even see it in this lifetime, but I know beyond anything and everything, that if I release my ‘head faith’ and live my life according to Your will, that I will one day share in all that You have promised.  For this I pray, Lord Jesus Christ.

 

Matthew 26:50-54

⁵⁰Jesus said to him, ^(A) “Friend,^(B) do what you came to do.”^[a] Then they came up and laid hands on Jesus and seized him. 51And behold, one of those who were with Jesus stretched out his hand and drew his^(C) sword and struck the servant^[b] of the high priest and cut off his ear. 52Then Jesus said to him, “Put your sword back into its place. For^(D) all who take the sword will perish by the sword.

Matthew 16

 15 “But what about you?” he asked. “Who do you say I am?”

 16 Simon Peter answered, “You are the Christ, the Son of the living God.”

 17 Jesus replied, “Blessed are you, Simon son of Jonah, for this was not revealed to you by man, but by my Father in heaven.

Luke 22:61

Simon, Simon, listen! Satan has demanded to sift all of you like wheat, but I have prayed for you that your own faith may not fail; and you, when once you have turned back, strengthen your brothers.” And he said to him, “Lord, I am ready to go with you to prison and to death!” Jesus said, “I tell you, Peter, the cock will not crow this day, until you have denied three times that you know me.”

 

Deuteronomy 1:30-33

30 The LORD your God, who is going before you, will fight for you, as he did for you in Egypt, before your very eyes, 31 and in the desert. There you saw how the LORD your God carried you, as a father carries his son, all the way you went until you reached this place.” 32 In spite of this, you did not trust in the LORD your God, 33 who went ahead of you on your journey, in fire by night and in a cloud by day, to search out places for you to camp and to show you the way you should go.

 

Romans 8:28

And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them.

Matthew 4:4

Man does not live on bread alone, but on every word that comes from the mouth of God.
Matthew 4:4 (NIV)

Psalm 27:14

Wait for the LORD; be strong and take heart and wait for the LORD.